Happy Winter Solstice!!
I just got a new laptop this week, and it's super light and tiny and I love it. I was a little nervous about getting a 13.3" screen, but I totally don't miss the 15". And for all the crap I've been hearing about Windows Vista, I am getting to know it this week and once you get used to where everything is, it's kind of cool-looking. I got tons of memory so I'm not running into any problems with it. Now I just have to figure out what the hell is going on with Word 2007 - it's totally different. But the best part is I can sit on the couch and dook around for hours guilt-free. It's so liberating being done. And having a job that I like. Yay for autonomy!
I just started reading the His Dark Materials trilogy. Saw Golden Compass last week and loved it, so I thought I better read the books. A woman behind me in line when I bought them asked if they were for my kids. I'm like, no, they're for me! I'm going to spend my holiday reading young adult fiction!
Friday
Thursday
December 6, 2007
Alright, so no one was compelled to comment on that hilarious squirrel story.
In two days I go to the graduation ceremony where I get hooded (or knighted as M. says) and I get to wear my Hogwarts robes. Fun! Mom and dad will be in town, but no brother as he has to play in the orchestra of the city opera that he is in that night.
Today I accepted a temporary position with the company I worked for in Seattle for four and half years before I moved to Austin. It will be nice to have a challenging and fun job again - flexible hours, great clients, and I get to keep living here (at least for the next 6 months). It feels a little weird maybe to be working for them again, but all in all I feel really lucky and hope I can do a good job for them. One of my first new clients is in Hawaii, and I am heading there in January for three days - with up to two more trips by June!
In two days I go to the graduation ceremony where I get hooded (or knighted as M. says) and I get to wear my Hogwarts robes. Fun! Mom and dad will be in town, but no brother as he has to play in the orchestra of the city opera that he is in that night.
Today I accepted a temporary position with the company I worked for in Seattle for four and half years before I moved to Austin. It will be nice to have a challenging and fun job again - flexible hours, great clients, and I get to keep living here (at least for the next 6 months). It feels a little weird maybe to be working for them again, but all in all I feel really lucky and hope I can do a good job for them. One of my first new clients is in Hawaii, and I am heading there in January for three days - with up to two more trips by June!
Saturday
November 10, 2007
My mom clipped this from her local newspaper and mailed it to me this week. It has brought me much joy.
****************
Squirrels' stashes sparked small fires
By TRISTAN SCOTT of the Missoulian
Fire investigators are pinning several recent spot fires near Seeley Lake on an unlikely group of arsonists - squirrels.
A man reported the wildfires last Wednesday afternoon outside his home on Montana Highway 83, moments after turning the ignition key on his RV.
Unbeknownst to the driver, a local colony of gray squirrels had been stowing pine cones in the vehicle's exhaust pipe, and the loaded tailpipe began blasting fiery cones across his driveway like a Roman candle, igniting a handful of
small grass fires.
According to the tongue-in-cheek fire report, Incident Commander Scott Meyer responded to the wildland fire with several engines in tow, and later ruled that the squirrels belonged to a paramilitary squirrel organization that has abounded for years in Seeley Lake, called the Pine Cone Liberation Organization (PCLO).
“A lapse in squirrel-oversight intelligence had allowed the PCLO to engage in recon, planning and sabotage without fear of consequence or retribution, in the form of being chased by a broom,” according to the report.
Calling the attack one “which will live in infamy,” Meyer blamed the incident on a well-known local dissident, “Slippy the Squirrel.” A critter notorious for his chirping fits and histrionics, Slippy's resistance efforts had previously been nonviolent in nature, Meyer said.
“After years of being shot at with blow-guns, run over by logging trucks and chased by neighborhood dogs, the squirrels struck back,” the report states. “This had been their Bastille, their Red October, their chance at glory! Suppression efforts were started by all fire engines - the owner of the property upon which the squirrels had made their presence felt let the firefighters use the garden hose to cool off the pine cones. At 15:16, all resources were released from the fire. At that time, Meyer called the fire controlled, contained and dead-out. Slippy the Squirrel, however, remains at large. The PCLO could not be reached for comment.”
****************
Squirrels' stashes sparked small fires
By TRISTAN SCOTT of the Missoulian
Fire investigators are pinning several recent spot fires near Seeley Lake on an unlikely group of arsonists - squirrels.
A man reported the wildfires last Wednesday afternoon outside his home on Montana Highway 83, moments after turning the ignition key on his RV.
Unbeknownst to the driver, a local colony of gray squirrels had been stowing pine cones in the vehicle's exhaust pipe, and the loaded tailpipe began blasting fiery cones across his driveway like a Roman candle, igniting a handful of
small grass fires.
According to the tongue-in-cheek fire report, Incident Commander Scott Meyer responded to the wildland fire with several engines in tow, and later ruled that the squirrels belonged to a paramilitary squirrel organization that has abounded for years in Seeley Lake, called the Pine Cone Liberation Organization (PCLO).
“A lapse in squirrel-oversight intelligence had allowed the PCLO to engage in recon, planning and sabotage without fear of consequence or retribution, in the form of being chased by a broom,” according to the report.
Calling the attack one “which will live in infamy,” Meyer blamed the incident on a well-known local dissident, “Slippy the Squirrel.” A critter notorious for his chirping fits and histrionics, Slippy's resistance efforts had previously been nonviolent in nature, Meyer said.
“After years of being shot at with blow-guns, run over by logging trucks and chased by neighborhood dogs, the squirrels struck back,” the report states. “This had been their Bastille, their Red October, their chance at glory! Suppression efforts were started by all fire engines - the owner of the property upon which the squirrels had made their presence felt let the firefighters use the garden hose to cool off the pine cones. At 15:16, all resources were released from the fire. At that time, Meyer called the fire controlled, contained and dead-out. Slippy the Squirrel, however, remains at large. The PCLO could not be reached for comment.”
Wednesday
November 7, 2007
How can I be done with my Ph.D and still feel like I'm behind? Everything else was supposed to come crashing to a halt and I was supposed to go to Argentina or Italy or something with not a care in the world! Even so, it is soooo great to be done!
Saturday
I did it!
It wasn't quite as breezy as many had told me it would be, but I successfully defended yesterday! It took about an hour and a half, and while there was never any question as to whether they were going to sign or not, there were a couple of solid questions thrown my way that I could have handled better. And because I am who I am, I have been replaying the discussion in my head to see how I could have answered things more eloquently or impressively. I mean, I basically feel like I didn't answer Professor High Status' question. They all liked my research so much, I wanted to live up to their expectations and be able to wow them with my ability to precisely articulate my conclusions; I'd give myself a C+/B- in that department. Some of the comments were sort of pointless, but I respectfully nodded and waited for them to move on. I felt kind of dazed afterward, and wanted to process it more with my advisor, but I won't be able to do that until Monday. I knocked back a few pints of Guinness last night and I'm looking forward to M.I.A. tonight!
Posted by Dr. Stuckupgirl on November 3, 2007 :)
Posted by Dr. Stuckupgirl on November 3, 2007 :)
Friday
October 19, 2007
Okay, so I'm pretty much done with my dissertation now. I gave a copy to each of my committee members, got their signatures on a special pink "Request for Oral Examination" form (no small feat in itself), and turned it (the form) in to the Graduate School yesterday. I sat in the degree evaluator's office and got the official green light to have my defense on Nov. 2. Now, I wait. While a huge weight is definitely in the process of being lifted, for some reason I have developed an eye-twitch in the last 24 hours which is usually a sign of stress for me.
It's an unfamiliar feeling being done with the writing. The other day I was walking along thinking, 'don't all these people realize that I'm done? Can't they tell?' Life has indeed continued all around me oblivious to my little accomplishment. Sigh!
It's an unfamiliar feeling being done with the writing. The other day I was walking along thinking, 'don't all these people realize that I'm done? Can't they tell?' Life has indeed continued all around me oblivious to my little accomplishment. Sigh!
Wednesday
October 10, 2007
I could be wrapping up my dissertation right now, but I keep getting distracted by trying to line up work for January and the next few months. I only have a few revisions to make and cosmetic items like the table of contents, but I've put it off for two days so far. I'm basically sitting in front of the TV doing income projections on my calculator. Must focus!
Tuesday
October 2, 2007
OMG! I just turned in the full draft to my advisor. I basically ended up completely re-writing the first thirty pages, which took for-freaking-ever. I have been sitting at my desk non-stop for the past five days. So now, I wait for feedback, make more revisions, write acknowledgments (oscar speech!), etc., and move into the final phase of operation PhD.
Through this process, I have discovered, among other things, that Pepe thinks my halogen desk lamp is his own personal tanning bed. Right exactly where I need to put my notes and papers in order to get work done. Pepe!!! (shaking fist).
In other news, I stayed up until 2am last night reading The Lost: A Search for Six of Six Million. I'm halfway through it -- holy crap it's really interesting and compelling and horrible.
Through this process, I have discovered, among other things, that Pepe thinks my halogen desk lamp is his own personal tanning bed. Right exactly where I need to put my notes and papers in order to get work done. Pepe!!! (shaking fist).
In other news, I stayed up until 2am last night reading The Lost: A Search for Six of Six Million. I'm halfway through it -- holy crap it's really interesting and compelling and horrible.
Saturday
September 22, 2007
JT tagged me to share eight random things about myself and pass along the task to others.
Here’s how this is supposed to work:
1. Post these rules before you give your facts
2. List 8 random facts about yourself
3. At the end of your post, choose (tag) 8 people and list their names, linking to them
4. Leave a comment on their blog, letting them know they’ve been tagged.
Stuff about me:
1. There is a whole side of my family (my mom's) that lives in Argentina, most of whom I have never met. They are there because my grandparents fled Nazi Germany in the late 1930s after Kristallnacht.
2. I came in 32nd in the Alaska State High School Cross-Country Running Championship in 1985. That was the height of my athletic career, though I kept at it through my junior year of college.
3. I have a possibly unhealthy attachment to characters from The Muppet Show.
4. I think Catherine MacKinnon is perhaps the greatest legal and feminist scholar of our time.
5. Used to play jazz saxophone.
6. Went 7 years without shaving my legs. It was great to thumb my nose at Western feminine beauty norms and confront people's discomfort.
7. Am known to get belligerent if I've had too much to drink and find myself surrounded by sexist apathetic privileged lunk-heads. And sexist crap hanging on the walls in public spaces.
8. Totally admire all the women in my life but they probably don't know it.
I am tagging:
Rockabilachica
Return of the Silver Zephyr
Here’s how this is supposed to work:
1. Post these rules before you give your facts
2. List 8 random facts about yourself
3. At the end of your post, choose (tag) 8 people and list their names, linking to them
4. Leave a comment on their blog, letting them know they’ve been tagged.
Stuff about me:
1. There is a whole side of my family (my mom's) that lives in Argentina, most of whom I have never met. They are there because my grandparents fled Nazi Germany in the late 1930s after Kristallnacht.
2. I came in 32nd in the Alaska State High School Cross-Country Running Championship in 1985. That was the height of my athletic career, though I kept at it through my junior year of college.
3. I have a possibly unhealthy attachment to characters from The Muppet Show.
4. I think Catherine MacKinnon is perhaps the greatest legal and feminist scholar of our time.
5. Used to play jazz saxophone.
6. Went 7 years without shaving my legs. It was great to thumb my nose at Western feminine beauty norms and confront people's discomfort.
7. Am known to get belligerent if I've had too much to drink and find myself surrounded by sexist apathetic privileged lunk-heads. And sexist crap hanging on the walls in public spaces.
8. Totally admire all the women in my life but they probably don't know it.
I am tagging:
Rockabilachica
Return of the Silver Zephyr
Sunday
September 9, 2007
Last night I realized that there is now no part of my dissertation that has not been drafted. I finished the last section that had to be written "from scratch" last night! The last major thing to do is go back and revamp the introduction and literature review chapters, but at least those have already been written - albeit two years ago and rather thinly, I might add. Anyway, this realization last night was the first time this whole PhD thing actually seemed possible. Like in a real, achievable, concrete way. It made me kind of giddy.
Tuesday
September 4, 2007
36 feels pretty much like 35. But occasionally I am struck by that "there must be some mistake!" feeling. How did I get to be a 36-year-old woman? But anyway, I'm off to get a facial and then have a beer. Onward!
Thursday
August 30, 2007
The best show on television, Friday Night Lights, is starting its second season on Oct. 5. Austin narrowly avoided losing the filming of this show to New Mexico or Louisiana, and the show itself almost didn't get renewed. I think this show is consistently better than Weeds, The Closer, and Lost, with perhaps a tie with Heroes. I love watching it not just for the superb acting and plot lines, but for the glimpses of familiar sights around Austin in the background.
This is all to preface my latest FNL sighting of one Taylor Kitsch, who plays hunky bad-boy Tim Riggins on the show.
He came in to South Congress Cafe today and waited for a table behind us (we were eating in the bar area). Prior to this I have scoped out Kyle Chandler three different times, who plays Coach Taylor (also seen recently on Grey's Anatomy as the bomb specialist guy who gets blown up, and in the 1990's as the lead on Early Edition). He walks his Jack Russell Terrier around the area and lives in the State House Apartments on S. Congress.
This is all to preface my latest FNL sighting of one Taylor Kitsch, who plays hunky bad-boy Tim Riggins on the show.
He came in to South Congress Cafe today and waited for a table behind us (we were eating in the bar area). Prior to this I have scoped out Kyle Chandler three different times, who plays Coach Taylor (also seen recently on Grey's Anatomy as the bomb specialist guy who gets blown up, and in the 1990's as the lead on Early Edition). He walks his Jack Russell Terrier around the area and lives in the State House Apartments on S. Congress.
Wednesday
August 29, 2007
Last day of work at my part-time research fellow job today. The professor who was never sufficiently impressed with me was finally impressed with the paper I wrote (yay!). Hopefully he'll write his sections and we can submit it for publication. I'll need to keep on him about that.
I'm now solely supported by my consulting income. It's scary but liberating, and I feel more adult-like somehow. Job prospects, as in a permanent full-time job, are scattered and disparate and I'm unsure how to "package" myself. I'm looking at both applied/practice and academic positions. One came up today at a Foundation in Los Angeles. Aren't houses that would be $250k here like a million dollars there? Geez. But it's an awesome position and they actually want someone with a PhD.
Not quite done with the dissertation yet -- give me two more weeks for a full draft (of crap, but a full draft o' crap).
I'm now solely supported by my consulting income. It's scary but liberating, and I feel more adult-like somehow. Job prospects, as in a permanent full-time job, are scattered and disparate and I'm unsure how to "package" myself. I'm looking at both applied/practice and academic positions. One came up today at a Foundation in Los Angeles. Aren't houses that would be $250k here like a million dollars there? Geez. But it's an awesome position and they actually want someone with a PhD.
Not quite done with the dissertation yet -- give me two more weeks for a full draft (of crap, but a full draft o' crap).
Tuesday
August 21, 2007
My out of state driver's license, which I have stubbornly held on to for the last five years, is going to expire in about two weeks. I held on to it as incentive to get back to the place I came from before it expired, and well, that didn't happen. So now I have to get a stinky ole Texas driver's license, but I don't want to surrender my old one, because I like to keep stuff like that for the historical record I hold in various boxes in the back of my closet. Apparently it is against the law to have two valid licenses at the same time, so they take the old one when you go in. The thing to do is tell them I "lost it," but won't that look suspicious when they see that it is coincidentally expiring in two weeks? Plus I am a terrible liar. Won't they know I'm lying? Anyone have any advice? If I wait until the out of state one expires, they won't need to keep it but then I have to take the written driver's test - no way!
So, should I lie? Or should I just give it to them?
UPDATE: So I totally lied. I'm so proud. It was a little hairy for a while because at first they couldn't find my license record in the other state's database. But soon I will have the official license which will stand as a reminder of my failure to return to the promised land within five years. I know, I'm being overly dramatic. Too bad this license doesn't come with in-state tuition.
So, should I lie? Or should I just give it to them?
UPDATE: So I totally lied. I'm so proud. It was a little hairy for a while because at first they couldn't find my license record in the other state's database. But soon I will have the official license which will stand as a reminder of my failure to return to the promised land within five years. I know, I'm being overly dramatic. Too bad this license doesn't come with in-state tuition.
Monday
August 13, 2007
Someone just gave me a fortune cookie, and the fortune reads:
"To be mature is to accept imperfections."
I think I will put that on a t-shirt and wear it to my dissertation defense.
"To be mature is to accept imperfections."
I think I will put that on a t-shirt and wear it to my dissertation defense.
Thursday
August 9, 2007
Momentary freak out over. Everything will work out. I just wish time would stand still for a little while.
Tuesday
August 7, 2007
Am I crazy for considering applying for an academic job in South Carolina? Is it true that committee members won't write a letter of recommendation unless they've seen a draft of your dissertation? What if the deadline for applying is before they will see a draft? I thought they didn't want to be bothered with seeing a draft before they absolutely have to. Who knows the answers to these questions? I really need to stop reading the message boards at the Chronicle of Higher Education because they give me heartburn.
I am cycling through my tri-monthly phase of thinking I could be perfectly content doing research as a professor somewhere (if someplace would have me). Truthfully, I have actually enjoyed the dissertation process once I got the hang of it, and it's made me think I could actually be good at this stuff. But then I think I would get bored and miss the glamorous life of social program evaluation. And could I really function productively without deadlines and clients? A survey of sociology PhDs found that non-academic jobs pay more and have less hours, but that they weren't as happy. Great. But I'm going to assume they had some crappy government job somewhere and really wanted to be a professor instead.
Oh, what to do.
I am cycling through my tri-monthly phase of thinking I could be perfectly content doing research as a professor somewhere (if someplace would have me). Truthfully, I have actually enjoyed the dissertation process once I got the hang of it, and it's made me think I could actually be good at this stuff. But then I think I would get bored and miss the glamorous life of social program evaluation. And could I really function productively without deadlines and clients? A survey of sociology PhDs found that non-academic jobs pay more and have less hours, but that they weren't as happy. Great. But I'm going to assume they had some crappy government job somewhere and really wanted to be a professor instead.
Oh, what to do.
Thursday
August 2, 2007
I know I can be territorial and controlling (ya don't say!), but here's a situation that really has me fuming. We live in a duplex, and there is a shared storage building in the backyard that has a washer and dryer in it. The utilities that run the washer and dryer go to our side of the duplex, hence, whatever usage that happens is paid for by us. It's impossible to know exactly how much of our water, electricity, and gas bills come from the washer and dryer each month. We've just thought as long as the neighbors aren't excessive about it, we'll just deal rather than ask them for $5 a month or whatever (seems petty). But our neighbors have people stay with them every so often and these people use the machines too. It pisses me off that I'm subsidizing their laundry. Our neighbors have never asked who pays for those utilities and we haven't told them. M. doesn't want to be petty (cause he's a nice guy) and I loathe confrontation but this is getting under my skin.
Wednesday
August 1, 2007
Sent my advisor a revised Chapter 4 on Sunday. He finished editing it and I need to go pick it up today. It was 41 pages! I'm trying to get Chapter 5 worked out before the week is up: It's the chapter on the conditioning effects of depression and self-efficacy on strain, and how different levels of those variables affect the different kinds of outcomes I'm studying. The findings are interesting -- depression amplifies the effect of strain on outcomes like running away and suicidal behavior, but buffers the effect of strain on more externalized outcomes like aggressive delinquent acts and shoplifting. Those are the findings for girls. There are a couple of similarities in the boys' findings, but generally they don't hold for them. Self-efficacy seems to act as a buffer for both girls and boys, but more so for girls. Fascinating.
I had to re-run the interaction models because the first time I ran them (months ago) I didn't "mean center" the variables involved in the interaction. Apparently this is what you're supposed to do. I think it's kind of optional, but customary. It doesn't affect the results, just the interpretation of the results, and it also reduces multicollinearity between the interaction term and the variables that are multiplied together to create the interaction term. My adviser didn't think this was necessary, but I'm anticipating the comments from the rest of my committee. Anyway, so I created the new mean-centered variables for the girls and re-ran the analysis, updated the tables. Tonight I will do the same for the boys' sample, and then I can start augmenting Chapter 5 with some exposition about the findings. I need to get this DONE this week so I can focus on the conclusion -- what are the big findings, why, what do they mean, so what, etc. I will soon be going from "serious" mode into "Red Alert" mode (stole that from the blog Reassigned Time). Which means no more staying up until 1am watching non-stop episodes of "24."
I had to re-run the interaction models because the first time I ran them (months ago) I didn't "mean center" the variables involved in the interaction. Apparently this is what you're supposed to do. I think it's kind of optional, but customary. It doesn't affect the results, just the interpretation of the results, and it also reduces multicollinearity between the interaction term and the variables that are multiplied together to create the interaction term. My adviser didn't think this was necessary, but I'm anticipating the comments from the rest of my committee. Anyway, so I created the new mean-centered variables for the girls and re-ran the analysis, updated the tables. Tonight I will do the same for the boys' sample, and then I can start augmenting Chapter 5 with some exposition about the findings. I need to get this DONE this week so I can focus on the conclusion -- what are the big findings, why, what do they mean, so what, etc. I will soon be going from "serious" mode into "Red Alert" mode (stole that from the blog Reassigned Time). Which means no more staying up until 1am watching non-stop episodes of "24."
July 25, 2007
I wonder what Ph.D. program would let somebody back in after 33 years?
Queen Guitarist to Complete Doctorate
LONDON — Brian May is completing his doctorate in astrophysics, more than 30 years after he abandoned his studies to form the rock group Queen. ...more
Queen Guitarist to Complete Doctorate
LONDON — Brian May is completing his doctorate in astrophysics, more than 30 years after he abandoned his studies to form the rock group Queen. ...more
Monday
July 23, 2007
I didn't get crap done this weekend because I was busy reading Harry Potter #7 since Saturday afternoon. I'm almost done, and I'm just sitting here at work thinking about how I can't wait until I get home to finish it. I don't want it to go by so fast, but at the same time it's impossible for me to read it slowly. I've already cried at one part, I'm such a sap.
Friday was an all-day session of consulting on the Gates project with my colleagues from Seattle. It was totally exhausting. I was so not in my right mind that when I got home I impulsively bought a domain name and webhosting without really knowing why or how I was going to do anything with it. I wonder if I can cancel it -- there's really no need in my life for more distraction.
The Nordstrom sale on Saturday was kind of disappointing. I don't know if it's because we have such a small store and they choose to carry stuff that doesn't happen to appeal to me, or if the clothes are just boring this year. I ended up buying two tops that were on the clearance racks (not the anniversary sale) and one at regular price which I'm going to return because it's too big. All in all a bit of a let down.
Friday was an all-day session of consulting on the Gates project with my colleagues from Seattle. It was totally exhausting. I was so not in my right mind that when I got home I impulsively bought a domain name and webhosting without really knowing why or how I was going to do anything with it. I wonder if I can cancel it -- there's really no need in my life for more distraction.
The Nordstrom sale on Saturday was kind of disappointing. I don't know if it's because we have such a small store and they choose to carry stuff that doesn't happen to appeal to me, or if the clothes are just boring this year. I ended up buying two tops that were on the clearance racks (not the anniversary sale) and one at regular price which I'm going to return because it's too big. All in all a bit of a let down.
Wednesday
July 18, 2007
So not to jinx anything, but I've been making more progress on chapter 4. I'm figuring out what I need to do to move forward: it involves wasting a lot of paper and printing out a version of the chapter, sitting on the couch with a pencil, and making hand-written revisions on the page. Then I go back to the computer and make all the revisions. For some reason, I can see more clearly what needs to be done that way. I also managed to sit down and work on it in the evening hours last night...the shock! It's the only way - I have to find more hours to do this, so breaking my habit of no-work-in-the-evening is one way. I am definitely more tired, but I've never known of anyone who was well-rested and fresh as a daisy while trying to meet their dissertation deadlines, right? Sheesh.
I also tried re-visiting an old standby last Friday: a certain coffee shop with large tables and a library-like atmosphere. The change of scenery worked pretty well, though it still took me about 3 hours to write one paragraph (which is more than I was doing at home). Sometimes it's just excruciating to get that first bit down, but then you've broken the ice and it flows better from there.
I also tried re-visiting an old standby last Friday: a certain coffee shop with large tables and a library-like atmosphere. The change of scenery worked pretty well, though it still took me about 3 hours to write one paragraph (which is more than I was doing at home). Sometimes it's just excruciating to get that first bit down, but then you've broken the ice and it flows better from there.
Friday
July 13, 2007
If it's not apparent from some of my posts, I am really really frustrated with myself and my inability to be as productive as I need to be at this stage of the dissertation game. I am constantly worried and anxious coupled with cycles of low energy and gloom. I have a great support person in Reluctant Texan, who totally understands. But I did not expect to find additional validation and understanding from my dad.
He occasionally asks me how it's going with with writing, and I explain my tortured process of fits and starts, getting bogged down and overwhelmed, etc. He then says he completely understands, and that he's going through the same thing with his ongoing restoration of a 1935 Ford 4-door Touring Sedan that used to belong to his Aunt. This is what one looks like when it's all gussied up (his is actually midnight blue):
He goes 10 days without working on it, then feels it hanging over his head, starts again, gets bogged down, gives up for awhile, the whole thing. I have to say I found this pretty comforting, and it was nice to have his empathy.
Okay, time to get to work.
He occasionally asks me how it's going with with writing, and I explain my tortured process of fits and starts, getting bogged down and overwhelmed, etc. He then says he completely understands, and that he's going through the same thing with his ongoing restoration of a 1935 Ford 4-door Touring Sedan that used to belong to his Aunt. This is what one looks like when it's all gussied up (his is actually midnight blue):
He goes 10 days without working on it, then feels it hanging over his head, starts again, gets bogged down, gives up for awhile, the whole thing. I have to say I found this pretty comforting, and it was nice to have his empathy.
Okay, time to get to work.
Tuesday
July 10, 2007
So the other night I was watching What Not To Wear until 2:00 in the morning. I watched the opening sequence over and over, glassy-eyed and bored. The next day, the not-so-subliminal messages of the show started to sink in. [must-be-feminine-must-be-feminine-must-be-feminine]. No, not that one. I, stuckupgirl, have only 8 more weeks to legally wear a miniskirt according Stacy and Clinton. Though by some measures I perhaps am already too late. What does "no miniskirts after 35" mean? M. thinks it means you can still wear them while 35. I jest, of course. This show is all about teaching women patriarchal norms about their bodies and how to be properly feminine (wouldn't want to make anyone uncomfortable by not being able to identify the oppressed sex class). But yet sometimes it's hard to look away.
On another note, I have about 6 weeks to finish a complete draft of the diss. This means finishing the results chapters, writing the discussion, and beefing up the literature review. In the meantime I have to write 30 pages of an article for publication for the professor I work for (said professor, by the way, is not nearly as impressed with me as I think he should be, which is annoying). But friends and family are buying plane tickets to come see me graduate in December, so I guess I better pull something out of my you-know-what so as not to disappoint them.
Oh and I have insomnia too. Lovely.
P.S. Dad turns 73 today.
On another note, I have about 6 weeks to finish a complete draft of the diss. This means finishing the results chapters, writing the discussion, and beefing up the literature review. In the meantime I have to write 30 pages of an article for publication for the professor I work for (said professor, by the way, is not nearly as impressed with me as I think he should be, which is annoying). But friends and family are buying plane tickets to come see me graduate in December, so I guess I better pull something out of my you-know-what so as not to disappoint them.
Oh and I have insomnia too. Lovely.
P.S. Dad turns 73 today.
Sunday
June 24, 2007
Back to reality. Here are the highlights of my last two weeks.
My 16-day journey began with a day in Seattle (an unintentional 6-hour layover), the only documentation of which is a picture of a cheesecake stand at the Market. Each is the size of a cupcake.
Next was Anchorage to hang out with my pseudo-nephew and godson Kenton, and my best friend and her hubby. We have known each other now going on 26 years! Kenton was awesome and wanted to follow me everywhere.
On a hike near Girdwood, AK. The rushing water behind us was way more interesting than posing for the camera.
CC hauling herself across the gulch in the hand tram on the Girdwood hike.
Hanging out at Westchester Lagoon in Anchorage with my best friend eating chocolate, drinking coffee, and admiring my new clogs bought without sales tax and a $25 off coupon. The little things in life that keep me going.
The other little thing in life we love:
My first night in Missoula - taken from parent's back deck. For anyone who wonders why it's called Big Sky Country.
Artificial rapids designed for whitewater kayakers to practice on the Clark Fork River in downtown Missoula, MT.
Ye old alma mater. Main Hall with the "M" and Mt. Sentinel in the background. It's always weird to walk around one's old college campus.
My mom on our hike to the Blodgett Canyon overlook. Bitterroot Valley below.
Blodgett Canyon, Bitterroot Mountains, MT.
My future retirement castle? Where I should have written my dissertation from - I'd be done by now.
The HobNob Cafe on Missoula's so-called "Hip Strip."
And finally, the Missoula Osprey (rookie team for the AZ Diamondbacks) on opening night at their new stadium. That's Chance Wheeless, who was in the juvenile delinquency class I TA'd last Fall, playing first base.
My 16-day journey began with a day in Seattle (an unintentional 6-hour layover), the only documentation of which is a picture of a cheesecake stand at the Market. Each is the size of a cupcake.
Next was Anchorage to hang out with my pseudo-nephew and godson Kenton, and my best friend and her hubby. We have known each other now going on 26 years! Kenton was awesome and wanted to follow me everywhere.
On a hike near Girdwood, AK. The rushing water behind us was way more interesting than posing for the camera.
CC hauling herself across the gulch in the hand tram on the Girdwood hike.
Hanging out at Westchester Lagoon in Anchorage with my best friend eating chocolate, drinking coffee, and admiring my new clogs bought without sales tax and a $25 off coupon. The little things in life that keep me going.
The other little thing in life we love:
My first night in Missoula - taken from parent's back deck. For anyone who wonders why it's called Big Sky Country.
Artificial rapids designed for whitewater kayakers to practice on the Clark Fork River in downtown Missoula, MT.
Ye old alma mater. Main Hall with the "M" and Mt. Sentinel in the background. It's always weird to walk around one's old college campus.
My mom on our hike to the Blodgett Canyon overlook. Bitterroot Valley below.
Blodgett Canyon, Bitterroot Mountains, MT.
My future retirement castle? Where I should have written my dissertation from - I'd be done by now.
The HobNob Cafe on Missoula's so-called "Hip Strip."
And finally, the Missoula Osprey (rookie team for the AZ Diamondbacks) on opening night at their new stadium. That's Chance Wheeless, who was in the juvenile delinquency class I TA'd last Fall, playing first base.
Thursday
May 31, 2007
Welp, I squandered another perfectly good day I had set aside to work on revisions. After lots of pacing, working on other projects, obsessively checking blogs, and a mid-afternoon sojourn to El Sol y La Luna for a dissatisfying huevos rancheros and funny-tasting tortilla chips, I currently have a headache, am hot, stiff, and due at Lovejoy's in an hour to listen to loud music.
In the crossing-things-off-lists department, I finished up my scope of work on a consulting contract I had, and let them know I wouldn't be available for further work. Yayhoo! But, wouldn't you know it, about three weeks ago another consulting opportunity came my way that I couldn't pass up, so I now have two other jobs besides finishing my dissertation. This new job has me working for the firm I worked for in Seattle. They are consultants on a project here in Austin, and brought me in as an independent to help out. It's a really interesting project, funded by the Gates Foundation, to engage the community in high school redesign efforts.
To add to the many self-inflicted barriers to finishing, I leave next week on a 16-day trip. Aagh! Maybe I need a new kitten.
In the crossing-things-off-lists department, I finished up my scope of work on a consulting contract I had, and let them know I wouldn't be available for further work. Yayhoo! But, wouldn't you know it, about three weeks ago another consulting opportunity came my way that I couldn't pass up, so I now have two other jobs besides finishing my dissertation. This new job has me working for the firm I worked for in Seattle. They are consultants on a project here in Austin, and brought me in as an independent to help out. It's a really interesting project, funded by the Gates Foundation, to engage the community in high school redesign efforts.
To add to the many self-inflicted barriers to finishing, I leave next week on a 16-day trip. Aagh! Maybe I need a new kitten.
May 24, 2007
I have had this complete and total aversion to writing lately, as illustrated by my heavy use of photos and images in my blog entries. And lengthy quotations from Supreme Court justices. This probably has something to do with the fact that I am deep into the writing phase on my dissertation. After months of labored statistical analysis, or as we like to say, "running models," I finally have to face my 13 tables of regression coefficients and describe what it all means in English.
I finished a first draft of this results chapter, and it was painful technical writing. I felt like something really heavy was sitting on me. Today I met with my adviser to get some help in figuring out where to go from here, and I am feeling a little overwhelmed. I kind of know what I need to do to get it to where I want it, but I always have that niggling fear and self-doubt that I won't be able to do it. Like this time, I have just reached my limit and it's not going to happen. How did I become so fearful and lazy? That is a bad combination - the fear and the lazy. My adviser occasionally asks me, "what else have you been doing, besides this?" That question lays bare the hard reality that I have become a very poor manager of time.
I finished a first draft of this results chapter, and it was painful technical writing. I felt like something really heavy was sitting on me. Today I met with my adviser to get some help in figuring out where to go from here, and I am feeling a little overwhelmed. I kind of know what I need to do to get it to where I want it, but I always have that niggling fear and self-doubt that I won't be able to do it. Like this time, I have just reached my limit and it's not going to happen. How did I become so fearful and lazy? That is a bad combination - the fear and the lazy. My adviser occasionally asks me, "what else have you been doing, besides this?" That question lays bare the hard reality that I have become a very poor manager of time.
Wednesday
Sunday
April 29, 2007
From the Jo's Easter Pet Parade and Costume Contest, my favorite contestants:
Hot Dog
Bjork Dog
Denim Jo's Dog
Hot Dog
Bjork Dog
Denim Jo's Dog
Tuesday
Friday
April 20, 2007
Ruth Bader Ginsburg, April 18, 2007:
The Court further pretends that its decision protects women. Women might come to regret their physician-counseled choice of an intact D&E and suffer from “[s]evere depression and loss of esteem,” the Court worries. Notably, the solution the Court approves is not to require doctors to inform women adequately of the different procedures they might choose, and the risks each entails. Instead, the Court shields women by denying them any choice in the matter. This way of protecting women recalls ancient notions about women’s place in society and under the Constitution — ideas that have long since been discredited.
Although today’s opinion does not go so far as to discard Roe or Casey, the Court — differently composed than it was when we last considered a restrictive abortion regulation — is hardly faithful to Casey’s invocations of “the rule of law” and the “principles of stare decisis.”
In candor, the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act, and the Court’s defense of it, cannot be understood as anything other than an effort to chip away at a right declared again and again by this Court — and with increasing comprehension of its centrality to women’s lives. A decision of the character the Court makes today should not have staying power.
Tuesday
April 10, 2007
Happy Birthday Okazaki Fragment! On March 31, O.F. turned 12 years old. Thanks for being my familiar, and for keeping my lap warm all these years.
Friday
March 23, 2007
Build it and they will come
My mom's friend Sylvia who lives in Canada took this picture outside of Banff. They had to build the elk and deer their own crossing because after the highway was built there were lots of collisions (this was where their original path was before the humans invaded). Sylvia says it didn't take the animals long to learn that this was their "road."
I have often wished our government would spend the money to build these crossings. I heart Canada.
My mom's friend Sylvia who lives in Canada took this picture outside of Banff. They had to build the elk and deer their own crossing because after the highway was built there were lots of collisions (this was where their original path was before the humans invaded). Sylvia says it didn't take the animals long to learn that this was their "road."
I have often wished our government would spend the money to build these crossings. I heart Canada.
Sunday
March 11, 2007
21-year-old Lily Allen, speaking to the AV Club, on the effect of how women musicians are portrayed in the media:
AVC: You've talked a lot about way women in rock tend to get patronized as "the female version of this male artist," instead of being written up for themselves. And you took on NME over a comment about how you can rock "even in stilettos." Why do you think there's so much of a problem finding positive ways to talk about female musicians?
LA: I don't know. I'm really saddened by the whole situation. It makes me really, really angry. I think that there's a view of… I think that as long as women are parading around on television, taking their clothes off to sell records, then guys will be able to take the piss out of us. That's what it comes down to. I have a little brother, Alfie, and he has a very poor view of women, and I think the only explanation… He's got three incredibly strong women surrounding him in his home life, yet he's so affected by the stuff he sees in the media and the way women are portrayed. And I think until TV programmers are more responsible about putting these slutty women on TV dancing around, that's the view that kids are going to have. Ultimately, that's my only explanation.
AVC: You've talked a lot about way women in rock tend to get patronized as "the female version of this male artist," instead of being written up for themselves. And you took on NME over a comment about how you can rock "even in stilettos." Why do you think there's so much of a problem finding positive ways to talk about female musicians?
LA: I don't know. I'm really saddened by the whole situation. It makes me really, really angry. I think that there's a view of… I think that as long as women are parading around on television, taking their clothes off to sell records, then guys will be able to take the piss out of us. That's what it comes down to. I have a little brother, Alfie, and he has a very poor view of women, and I think the only explanation… He's got three incredibly strong women surrounding him in his home life, yet he's so affected by the stuff he sees in the media and the way women are portrayed. And I think until TV programmers are more responsible about putting these slutty women on TV dancing around, that's the view that kids are going to have. Ultimately, that's my only explanation.
Thursday
March 1, 2007
A couple of public service announcements:
I finally stopped in at Dominican Joe's, the new coffee shop in that corner strip mall at Riverside and S. Congress, and I highly recommend it! Reluctant Texan and I dropped in while walking back from the Barack Obama rally, and I was pleased to find that it was not a cheesy knock-off corporate coffee chain of some sort, but rather an independent venture that collaborates with a local non-profit to buy the coffee directly from the growers. Plus it has a calm atmosphere and plenty of tables, breakfast tacos if you get there early enough, and toasted bagels and cream cheese. From their website:
Dominican Joe's primary coffee is purchased from Makarios, an Austin-based non-profit organization doing educational development work in the Dominican Republic. Skipping the large corporate middle-man, Makarios works directly with farmers in the region and pays them higher wages and supports their communities in an effort to develop self-sustaining skills for the future.
One thing they fail to mention is that Makarios is a faith-based organization, so there may be some word-o-Jesus-spreadin' going on in the DR. Not sure how I feel about this.
The second promotional item is a cool-sounding SXSW day show taking place on Thursday March 15 at Lovejoy's. It's co-sponsored by Three Imaginary Girls.
I finally stopped in at Dominican Joe's, the new coffee shop in that corner strip mall at Riverside and S. Congress, and I highly recommend it! Reluctant Texan and I dropped in while walking back from the Barack Obama rally, and I was pleased to find that it was not a cheesy knock-off corporate coffee chain of some sort, but rather an independent venture that collaborates with a local non-profit to buy the coffee directly from the growers. Plus it has a calm atmosphere and plenty of tables, breakfast tacos if you get there early enough, and toasted bagels and cream cheese. From their website:
Dominican Joe's primary coffee is purchased from Makarios, an Austin-based non-profit organization doing educational development work in the Dominican Republic. Skipping the large corporate middle-man, Makarios works directly with farmers in the region and pays them higher wages and supports their communities in an effort to develop self-sustaining skills for the future.
One thing they fail to mention is that Makarios is a faith-based organization, so there may be some word-o-Jesus-spreadin' going on in the DR. Not sure how I feel about this.
The second promotional item is a cool-sounding SXSW day show taking place on Thursday March 15 at Lovejoy's. It's co-sponsored by Three Imaginary Girls.
Sunday
February 18, 2007
Today I sadly report the theft of my bicycle. Sometime between 2:30 and 11:00pm on Friday, someone came up to our house, opened the front gate (the entire front yard is fenced), walked up to the porch, and took my bike. Just like that. No, it wasn't locked up, and for almost two years it didn't need to be. The other thing is that with our schedules, there is almost always someone home, and we don't have regular schedules. I am home all but two days a week! The one evening I go out to have some beers after a meeting this happens (Puritanical analysis: I'm being punished for not working hard enough!). Luckily M.'s bike was at work.
I totally blame irritating developer-dude who, for the past several months, has brought scads of construction crews onto the property at all hours of the day most days of the week. I figure this has multiplied the number of people who know our little house even exists, because you can't really see it from the street if you're just driving by. We talked all winter about how we needed to move my bike to the storage garage - of course! And last Fall I just got a full tune-up and a new front fork put on it, with a new headlight too. Needless to say I have been very depressed about this - as I do tend to form unhealthy attachments to inanimate objects. I bought this bike in 1996 from a little shop in Moscow, Idaho. The longer I have something, the harder it is for me to let go of it - it becomes a source of pride a la "I've had this ______ for 17 years!"
The other part that's depressing is the feeling victimized - that someone had the audacity to walk up to our front door and take something that was mine. So now, just in time for SXSW and springtime riding opportunities, I have no bike. Saturday M. took me to Flip Happy Crepes to cheer me up, and then we went to Lowe's and bought a "No Trespassing" sign. I haven't hung it up yet, but I'm looking forward to making our house look like drug dealers live there.
I totally blame irritating developer-dude who, for the past several months, has brought scads of construction crews onto the property at all hours of the day most days of the week. I figure this has multiplied the number of people who know our little house even exists, because you can't really see it from the street if you're just driving by. We talked all winter about how we needed to move my bike to the storage garage - of course! And last Fall I just got a full tune-up and a new front fork put on it, with a new headlight too. Needless to say I have been very depressed about this - as I do tend to form unhealthy attachments to inanimate objects. I bought this bike in 1996 from a little shop in Moscow, Idaho. The longer I have something, the harder it is for me to let go of it - it becomes a source of pride a la "I've had this ______ for 17 years!"
The other part that's depressing is the feeling victimized - that someone had the audacity to walk up to our front door and take something that was mine. So now, just in time for SXSW and springtime riding opportunities, I have no bike. Saturday M. took me to Flip Happy Crepes to cheer me up, and then we went to Lowe's and bought a "No Trespassing" sign. I haven't hung it up yet, but I'm looking forward to making our house look like drug dealers live there.
February 11, 2007
Progress! Last week I met with my dissertation chair to go over my latest research results, and I am very close to being done with this portion of the dissertation saga. I need to make one more good two to three week push on the statistical modeling, and then I can return to the writing portion. I have a skeletal manuscript at this point (what I used for my proposal defense), and basically need to add two more chapters: results and discussion. Then beef up the current literature review and methodology chapters, and it's done! Ha ha! Not as easy as it sounds, but definitely doable in a 5-6 month time frame. Probably sooner if I applied myself, but isn't that just the way it always is with everything. I like to apply myself just enough so I get it done but don't lose my mind in the process; plus it's nice to just sit around or do errands in the middle of the week and bask in the last few months of freedom and the simple gift of having so many hours in the week that are mine. I think the only casualty after this is all done will be my social skills - writing a dissertation means I spend an awful lot of time alone (no offense to Okazaki Fragment, Stella Bean, Pepe, and Frankie).
Tuesday
February 6, 2007
The movie about The Gits is coming to the SXSW film festival in a few weeks. This movie has been in the works for a long time, and premiered at the Seattle International Film Festival in 2005. I got an email a year ago about 7 Year Bitch and the remaining members of The Gits wanting to play a show in Austin when the movie was released here, but haven't heard anything since. Seems highly unlikely, a 7 Year Bitch reunion? I think I could die pretty happy after that.
January 30, 2007
It's starting. The thinly and not-so-thinly veiled misogynistic commentary about Hillary Clinton. The culprit I am pointing out at this time is not surprising, yet disappointing - Jon Stewart. Watching The Daily Show is basically like taking a bath in super-charged masculinity every night, but still I watch it. I suppose it's still a breath of fresh air in the current climate, but it rarely fails to alienate me. Last night it was so apparent, the way they covered Clinton vs. the way they covered Obama. Dredging up stereotypes about how women like to "talk" and men don't want to have to listen to women "talk." How Clinton's campaign isn't going to appeal to men because it will somehow remind them of their nagging wives?? Good god.
And another thing, what's the deal with media outlets referring to her as "Mrs." Clinton instead of Senator Clinton? Gets on my nerves.
And another thing, what's the deal with media outlets referring to her as "Mrs." Clinton instead of Senator Clinton? Gets on my nerves.
Monday
January 29, 2007
I'm going to Anchorage and Missoula in June for two weeks. Now I have something to look forward to and a self-imposed deadline for getting most of my dissertation stuff done before I leave. Yay!
My neck is killing me today - did I sleep on it funny? I don't really know, but I'm sort of dreading what Pilates is going to do to it today.
Tuesday
January 23, 2007
I really liked this article in the American Prospect called The Mommy Mantra: What female politicians lose when they brand themselves as mothers. Using recent public appearances by Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton as examples, the author explains that the Mommy Mantra is "the idea that what qualifies women for politics isn't their intelligence, their experience, their policy proposals, or even their character, but rather their inherent identities as feminine caretakers."
An excerpt:
"When Clinton and Pelosi claim political capital due to their experience as mothers and homemakers, they are selling their ambitious selves -- and, indeed, all women -- far short. Women don't deserve to be in politics because we're more compassionate or nurturing than men. We deserve to be there because we are human beings, and especially because we are human beings who, regardless of our choices about if and how to become mothers, continue to live under a social and political system that denies us many of the same options men have enjoyed for generations."
An excerpt:
"When Clinton and Pelosi claim political capital due to their experience as mothers and homemakers, they are selling their ambitious selves -- and, indeed, all women -- far short. Women don't deserve to be in politics because we're more compassionate or nurturing than men. We deserve to be there because we are human beings, and especially because we are human beings who, regardless of our choices about if and how to become mothers, continue to live under a social and political system that denies us many of the same options men have enjoyed for generations."
Friday
January 12, 2007
A new comic from Marshall, starring the one and only Pepe*, making its internet debut here at I'm Just Shy:
* Based on a true story
* Based on a true story
Thursday
January 4, 2007
Well, hello there 2007. When I was growing up, I never thought much past the year 2000, so I figure the rest is a bonus. I had a couple of weeks off over the holidays, allowing me to finally tackle that pile of bank statements and various other administrative tasks, organize my office, make Silver Zephyr's mom's butternut ball cookies, cat-sit Reluctant Texan's four cats, finally watch the first few episodes of the first season of Six Feet Under, type up one section of my mom's English translation of her father's family history (which was hand-written in Spanish ten years ago) and generally contemplate life.
New Year's Eve day I spent entirely on the phone catching up with old friends. It's comforting to talk to people who've known you a long time, because they have a certain perspective on who you are - they remind me of who I am when I've forgotten. My godson and pseudo-nephew Kenton turned 1 year old on New Year's Day. I sent him the first ten books of the Beatrix Potter series, the first installment of his personal library that should be complete by the time he's old enough to read.
For 2007, I have a singular goal, which I will approach with a laser-like focus: finish my dissertation research!! Yes, yes, you've all heard it before. And you will hear it many more times until it is done. My secondary goal is the trite "exercise more," which I am already closer to than in years past as I have signed up for six weeks of pilates starting January 22. Hopefully it won't bother my knee too much - I'm told I have patella-femoral syndrome, aka runner's knee. How I have runner's knee 14 years after I stopped running competitively, I have no earthly idea.
New Year's Eve day I spent entirely on the phone catching up with old friends. It's comforting to talk to people who've known you a long time, because they have a certain perspective on who you are - they remind me of who I am when I've forgotten. My godson and pseudo-nephew Kenton turned 1 year old on New Year's Day. I sent him the first ten books of the Beatrix Potter series, the first installment of his personal library that should be complete by the time he's old enough to read.
For 2007, I have a singular goal, which I will approach with a laser-like focus: finish my dissertation research!! Yes, yes, you've all heard it before. And you will hear it many more times until it is done. My secondary goal is the trite "exercise more," which I am already closer to than in years past as I have signed up for six weeks of pilates starting January 22. Hopefully it won't bother my knee too much - I'm told I have patella-femoral syndrome, aka runner's knee. How I have runner's knee 14 years after I stopped running competitively, I have no earthly idea.
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