I have had this complete and total aversion to writing lately, as illustrated by my heavy use of photos and images in my blog entries. And lengthy quotations from Supreme Court justices. This probably has something to do with the fact that I am deep into the writing phase on my dissertation. After months of labored statistical analysis, or as we like to say, "running models," I finally have to face my 13 tables of regression coefficients and describe what it all means in English.
I finished a first draft of this results chapter, and it was painful technical writing. I felt like something really heavy was sitting on me. Today I met with my adviser to get some help in figuring out where to go from here, and I am feeling a little overwhelmed. I kind of know what I need to do to get it to where I want it, but I always have that niggling fear and self-doubt that I won't be able to do it. Like this time, I have just reached my limit and it's not going to happen. How did I become so fearful and lazy? That is a bad combination - the fear and the lazy. My adviser occasionally asks me, "what else have you been doing, besides this?" That question lays bare the hard reality that I have become a very poor manager of time.
2 comments:
You will do it. And it will be totally worth it. Just think, "Dr. Stuckupgirl!"
Thanks! And I think Dr. Stuckupgirl has a certain ring to it. As does Dr. Reluctant Texan.
I should make that into a poster along with what adviser-who-shall-remain-nameless said, which is that my study is the best ever done on general strain theory. It's all about positive visualization. And shitty first drafts. And TV.
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