A little counter-evidence to the oft-cited romantic ideal of child-rearing:
Bundles Of . . . Misery
Parenting Got You Down? You're Not Alone, Says Study
By Elizabeth Agnvall
Special to The Washington Post
Tuesday, January 3, 2006
Published last month in the Journal of Health and Social Behavior, the study of 13,000 U.S. adults found that parents, from those with young children to empty nesters, reported being more miserable than non-parents. The researchers analyzed data from a national survey of families and households that asked respondents how many times in the past week, for example, they felt sad, distracted or depressed.
So: After all the sleepless nights and drowsy mornings, the cycles of feeding and throwing up, the American Girl doll accessories bought on credit, the toothpick models of the solar system and the algebra tutors . . . we would have been happier without it all?
In a word, says study author Robin Simon, an associate professor of sociology at Florida State University, yes.
Full article (link should be good for 60 days)
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3 comments:
Having a child makes me respect those that do not have children all that much more (of course, I did before). It is a difficult, unrelenting task. The advice to "get a life" is great if that were POSSIBLE. Without a support network, when are we supposed to get this "life"? I hate articles that don't provide solutions. I'm glad people are more open about how difficult raising children is - and that the myth of the boundless joy has fizzled. But for all the depressing aspects of child rearing (and believe me there are many), there is an equal amount of happiness. Like any situation in life, it is not a perfect one.
and just to annoy you:
http://observer.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,6903,1686984,00.html
heh heh
Ay, there's the rub - the lack of social support (both at the personal level and societal level) that makes it near impossible to 'get a life' is a major cause of the increased psychological distress in the first place. That women often end up bearing the brunt of the child care and housework as well as holding a full time job (and research suggests this is true even among couples who identify as egalitarian) - and feel that they are most responsible for doing so or else they are 'bad mothers' - of course causes more depression, anger, and anxiety. I think our culture deceives girls by grooming them to want children and a husband above all else, when the evidence overwhelmingly suggests that this is not the best thing for their mental health. Interestingly, these things (children, wife) seem to improve men's mental health - a patriarchal conspiracy, perhaps? Forgive me, I've been watching conspiracy theories on the History channel today.
At the same time, it seems to me that the difficulties, challenges, heartache, and hardships of raising a child are the very things that make it meaningful - does that make sense?
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