Missoula gets the Rolling Stones, too
This is the biggest thing to happen to Missoula, MT since...since...I think ever. Pearl Jam played a secret show there in 1993, and kicked off their tour there in 1998 (one of their members attended University of Montana), and Jesse Jackson came to town once to lead a labor march...nope - biggest thing ever.
Wednesday
Monday
July 24, 2006
Wrapping up things at the job this week so I can go on vacation with a clear head and looking towards the future. Upon my return, I just have to go in for one more day to do some human resources paperwork, and then I am cut loose. I don't know if I will write more about my many trying experiences there, because I am really ready to move on and forget that most of it happened. I did take away some useful lessons, though, which I may need to put into words to help me process and truly learn from it. But on to the vacation!!
In three days we're off to the northwest, with the kitty-monsters left in the capable hands of Reluctant Texan, and Frankie moving in with Watson over at "Camp Brushpile." A few things on our itinerary:
+The Moore Hotel, a low-budget vintage (as in old, not the hip new kind) hotel in Belltown, my old work neighborhood. It's the kind of place where you bring your own soap;
+The Capitol Hill Block Party, where some of this year's bands include the Murder City Devils, Band of Horses, Silversun Pickups, Smoosh, Visqueen, Schoolyard Heroes, Sera Cahoone, The Divorce, and The Emergency;
+Fremont, my old neighborhood, and the Ballard Seafood Fest, where we will see our friends Ms. Led perform;
+ Kenai Fjords National Park, where we hope to see sea otters and Puffins, Beautiful Downtown Talkeetna, where we will unfortunately miss the annual Moose Dropping Festival, and of course my stalwart hometown, Anchorage.
July 17, 2006
My week in Ann Arbor
I vacillated between "oh my god, i will never be able to do this (meaning my dissertation analysis)" and "i can totally do this." I kept hearing from the top sociological criminologist in the country that these data are very complex, and that it took him and his colleagues a year just to figure out one type of analytic approach. All of a sudden, I didn't feel so bad that I had stalled out a bit due to the intimidating nature of the data (said data being a 7-year survey of 6,000 Chicago youth ages 0 to 18 and their primary caregivers). The take home message: simplify. Got it.
My home for the week: Ann Arbor Bed & Breakfast, where every morning Pat had a feast of fresh fruit, assorted breads, yogurt, coffee, orange juice, and either an omelette or scramble of some sort complete with fresh herbs from the garden. Sigh. I have always been a breakfast person.
This bear was my constant companion, and watched Rockstar: Supernova with me. He agrees that Zayra is embarassing to watch.
On the left is University of Michigan's tower. I think it might even be less aesthetically pleasing than the UT Tower. Next to that is the very dramatic Michigan Union building, which seemed very old on the inside.
My daily walk to class (the red brick building below, which houses Interuniversity Consortium on Political and Social Research) took me down this street, University of Michigan's version of the Drag. Only this actually had shops and restaurants on it. 
The Detroit airport sucks. I think this picture captures the utterly soul-killing space I had to occupy for over two and a half hours.
Almost home! Somewhere over north Texas.
July 10, 2006
So far Ann Arbor is neato (getting to Ann Arbor from the Detroit airport is an expensive hassle though). The vibe reminds me a little of Missoula, with a little Austin mixed in. A cute laid back college town with lots of trees and historic houses. I sat out on my little balcony this evening, in perfect 80 degree weather with no mosquitoes. Oh the luxury! Unfortunately I forgot my gadget to upload pictures to my laptop, so I can't post pictures. There are about 6 people from Sweden staying at the bed and breakfast, who mostly ignore me and talk to each other in Swedish, and the proprieter is a little crazy in a good way. I'm gone from 8:15am to about 7pm each day at the workshop, about a 15 minute walk away. The other people in the workshop are really nice and I've already made friends with some cool women. People are actually interested in my dissertation research. Oh and I sat at a table with Rob Sampson and Felton Earls this afternoon. I was too tired by that time to ask any coherent questions though. That's my report for now!
P.S. Happy 72nd Birthday to my Dad, who doesn't read this blog.
P.S. Happy 72nd Birthday to my Dad, who doesn't read this blog.
Friday
July 7, 2006
Egads I was actually avoiding my own blog because I didn't want to look at that dude's mug anymore. And the nerve of him degrading the memory of Johnny Cash by wearing that tee shirt.
I think I've found my summer reality show - I'm having fun following Austin's own Patrice Pike on the show "Rockstar: SuperNova." Though I cannot for the life of me understand why she would actually want to be in a band with Tommy Lee. She won't win (if they pick a woman to front their band, they'll go for someone more "dirty"), but it is probably a good career move in terms of getting on national TV.
Sunday I go to Ann Arbor for a 5-day workshop having to do with my dissertation research. I'll have the whole thing done when I get back, right? Nah, I'm just hoping for some direction and motivation. I think I'm realizing how easy I have it as a doctoral candidate - why would I want to go mess up my cushy life by finishing?
I think I've found my summer reality show - I'm having fun following Austin's own Patrice Pike on the show "Rockstar: SuperNova." Though I cannot for the life of me understand why she would actually want to be in a band with Tommy Lee. She won't win (if they pick a woman to front their band, they'll go for someone more "dirty"), but it is probably a good career move in terms of getting on national TV.
Sunday I go to Ann Arbor for a 5-day workshop having to do with my dissertation research. I'll have the whole thing done when I get back, right? Nah, I'm just hoping for some direction and motivation. I think I'm realizing how easy I have it as a doctoral candidate - why would I want to go mess up my cushy life by finishing?
Monday
July 3, 2006
Rapist and Murderer
What a fitting event to mark our annual holiday celebrating freedom and patriotism. This is exactly why I loathe the military. I'm willing to accept that we need a military, given the state of global relations, but please don't tell me to respect the military or hold them up on some sort of moral pedastal. My father, now 72, was an officer in the military for 30 years (most of those years as a reservist), and as a product of the 1940s and 1950s believes that the military (well, at least the Navy) is a bastion of high moral standards. It makes me sad that he clings to this notion of what the military should be or aspires to be, but can never attain. I don't know how he would explain this utter debasement of human life and dignity without acknowledging that it is a direct effect of the misogynistic culture of the military. Premeditated rape and murder is not "collateral damage."
Tuesday
June 27, 2006 pt. 2
No more Sleater-Kinney, my friends.
This just in:
"After eleven years as a band, Sleater-Kinney have decided to go on indefinite hiatus. The upcoming summer shows will be our last. As of now, there are no plans for future tours or recordings. We feel lucky to have had the support of many wonderful people over the years. We want to thank everyone who has worked with us, written kind words about us, performed with us, and inspired us. But mostly we want to extend our gratitude to our amazing fans. You have been a part of our story from the beginning. We could not have made our music without your enthusiasm, passion, and loyalty. It is you who have made the entire journey worthwhile.
With love and thanks,
Sleater-Kinney"
Their last show appears to be Lollapalooza in Chicago this summer.
UPDATE: I have it from a reliable source that their publicist says they are trying to schedule a Northwest show before the summer's out (none of their final shows were in the Northwest). I doubt they wanted freaking Lollapalooza to be their last show. Not that any of us will be able to go, but you know. It's still nice news.
UPDATE: Last show will be at the Crystal Ballroom, in Portland on August 11. A much more fitting departure. I will have just returned from the NW four days before that - booo.
This just in:
"After eleven years as a band, Sleater-Kinney have decided to go on indefinite hiatus. The upcoming summer shows will be our last. As of now, there are no plans for future tours or recordings. We feel lucky to have had the support of many wonderful people over the years. We want to thank everyone who has worked with us, written kind words about us, performed with us, and inspired us. But mostly we want to extend our gratitude to our amazing fans. You have been a part of our story from the beginning. We could not have made our music without your enthusiasm, passion, and loyalty. It is you who have made the entire journey worthwhile.
With love and thanks,
Sleater-Kinney"
Their last show appears to be Lollapalooza in Chicago this summer.
UPDATE: I have it from a reliable source that their publicist says they are trying to schedule a Northwest show before the summer's out (none of their final shows were in the Northwest). I doubt they wanted freaking Lollapalooza to be their last show. Not that any of us will be able to go, but you know. It's still nice news.
UPDATE: Last show will be at the Crystal Ballroom, in Portland on August 11. A much more fitting departure. I will have just returned from the NW four days before that - booo.
June 27, 2006
So, it didn't take long for the so-called "Boy Crisis," which was widely touted by various media outlets and crack-pot post-feminists, to be de-bunked by actual longitudinal research on test scores, college readiness, and graduation rates.
From the Washington Post:
A study to be released today looking at long-term trends in test scores and academic success argues that widespread reports of U.S. boys being in crisis are greatly overstated and that young males in school are in many ways doing better than ever.
Any disparities have more to do with race and class than they do with sex differences, and much of the ballyhoo is familiar to those of us who came of age during the Backlash era of the late 80s/early 90s. The Washington Post article comments that indeed, the media backlash may be partly in response to Title IX reforms of the last 30 years - the benefits of which we're seeing now.
The Post article continues: [The report] concludes that much of the pessimism about young males seems to derive from inadequate research, sloppy analysis and discomfort with the fact that although the average boy is doing better, the average girl has gotten ahead of him.
Saturday
June 24, 2006
Good news in the world of orcas: "K" and "L" pods have arrived in Puget Sound with two young 'uns. There are only 89 Puget Sound orca whales in existence right now (the two new babies are #88 and #89). Hooray!
In more self-involved news, M. and I roasted a red pepper for the first time last night. I held it over the gas flame with tongs til it got all black and charred, and then M. did the peeling. It always looked so complicated and messy on TV, but it really was quite fast and so much better than the jar kind. We added it to some chopped zuchinni (cooked until just tender), fresh basil and chives, garlic, olive oil, and a dash of balsamic vinegar.
Thursday
June 22, 2006
Lately I have been weighing the pros and cons of staying in Austin or moving elsewhere, preferably closer to my aging parents and my best friend and her 6-month old kid. And mountains. And green forests. And 75 degree summers. It is the looming deadline of my graduation that has me up nights staring at the ceiling fan. It's less than a year away, and never mind that half my dissertation isn't written yet (I don't even have results yet), but good grief! What do I do now? Nothing really sounds appealing. Lots of things sound unappealing. Like academic jobs (though I've always known that one), or super-hoity toity research firm jobs where your salary is dependent on going out and finding clients and securing grants. The thing I like best, which is independent consulting, is economically infeasible without a second salary to back me up while building a client base. The biggest joke of all appears to be on me after all this PhD business: I left the best job I'll ever have four years ago, and now I fear I will spend the rest of my life trying to find something as good. Since I am afflicted with the ole "grass is greener" mentality, I can't see how this could have happened any other way though.
More and more, a certain feature of Austin living leads me in the direction of leaving town - the god damn mosquitoes. I swear. It is enough to drive me yelling and swatting right on out of this apparently swampy mosquito hole of central texas. And I refuse to invest hundreds of dollars in dry landscaping and propane-electric CO2 mosquito traps that *might* work. Alaska supposedly is famous for its bad mosquitoes, but at least there you have a fighting chance - they are so huge, you can feel them land on you, so before they start biting you can swish them away. Down here, they're so tiny and fast you have no idea they are even there until it's too late and about twelve of them have already had their way with you. My arms and legs are covered in little scabs because I have absolutely no self-control when it comes to itching. Anyway. I am so indecisive and non-committal that it might take something as inocuous as flying insects to help me make up my mind.
P.S. I am weary of thinking of pithy little titles for my entries, so I am going back to how diary entries always have been. Just the date.
More and more, a certain feature of Austin living leads me in the direction of leaving town - the god damn mosquitoes. I swear. It is enough to drive me yelling and swatting right on out of this apparently swampy mosquito hole of central texas. And I refuse to invest hundreds of dollars in dry landscaping and propane-electric CO2 mosquito traps that *might* work. Alaska supposedly is famous for its bad mosquitoes, but at least there you have a fighting chance - they are so huge, you can feel them land on you, so before they start biting you can swish them away. Down here, they're so tiny and fast you have no idea they are even there until it's too late and about twelve of them have already had their way with you. My arms and legs are covered in little scabs because I have absolutely no self-control when it comes to itching. Anyway. I am so indecisive and non-committal that it might take something as inocuous as flying insects to help me make up my mind.
P.S. I am weary of thinking of pithy little titles for my entries, so I am going back to how diary entries always have been. Just the date.
Wednesday
It's the longest day of the year, you say?
Here are the winners of the Real Hot 100 - there are a few Austin ladies in the mix.
Speaking of hot, Happy Summer Solstice! Always a big deal for someone who grew up in Alaska. Though it wasn't hot per se, it was very bright. They have parades, a midnight sun marathon, a midnight softball game (played without the use of lights, of course), and people dress up in crazy costumes.
And finally, a Hot Tip for breakfast sandwich afficionados: P & K Grocery at S. 5th and Mary makes a great one. They use cast-iron pans to create a lovely english muffin-fried egg-cheese-peppered bacon sandwich. My only complaint would be the American Cheese (godawful stuff-why do chefs think this is ok to use?), but there's not enough of it to bother me that much.
Speaking of hot, Happy Summer Solstice! Always a big deal for someone who grew up in Alaska. Though it wasn't hot per se, it was very bright. They have parades, a midnight sun marathon, a midnight softball game (played without the use of lights, of course), and people dress up in crazy costumes.
And finally, a Hot Tip for breakfast sandwich afficionados: P & K Grocery at S. 5th and Mary makes a great one. They use cast-iron pans to create a lovely english muffin-fried egg-cheese-peppered bacon sandwich. My only complaint would be the American Cheese (godawful stuff-why do chefs think this is ok to use?), but there's not enough of it to bother me that much.
Thursday
Random information I've been storing up
Best new brunch spot: Zax Pints and Plates on the corner of Riverside and Barton Springs.
Best waffles: Progress Coffee on weekends (they're heart-shaped!)
Best dessert: FINO! For M.'s birthday, we tried out this sister restaurant to Asti. My dessert ruled - a Madjool fig beignet with turkish coffee ice cream and coffee syrup.
Weirdest window display that no one ever mentioned: Your Living Room furniture store on the corner of S. Congress and Barton Springs. Male and female mannequins couple sitting in a bed with no clothes on, welcoming a third mannequin (female), who is standing at the foot of the bed (with no clothes on).
Wildlife sighting: We have three sparrow eggs in an unused mailbox by our front door.
Most unexpected outcome of a domestic animal spat: Our Frankie kicked Angus the cat's butt while staying at Angus' house while we were at Schlitterbahn. No one kicks Angus' butt! Until, now, that is! No word yet on whether Frankie is invited back.
Favorite newish album: Band of Horses, Seattle USA (check them out June 25th at the Parish)
Best band news: What Made Milwaukee Famous just signed to Barsuk, which makes them labelmates with Smoosh; Team Dresch may be getting back together; Smoosh released their second album this week; Murder City Devils are headlining the Capitol Hill Block Party for a one-time-only reunion, on July 29 in Seattle - I'll be there!
Best detail in the utopian world of the West Wing: During the series finale, the chief justice of the supreme court (swearing in Jimmy Smits, no less) was a woman. Sigh.
Latest TV series epiphany: The end of season 4 of Angel is a metaphor for the difference between people whose feminist consciousness is raised, and those who remain under the spell of blissful ignorance. It even showed how when the spell is broken, you get depressed. I don't really think the writers meant it this way, it was more of an Are you better off being unhappy with free will vs. happy without free will thing, but it totally works.
Best waffles: Progress Coffee on weekends (they're heart-shaped!)
Best dessert: FINO! For M.'s birthday, we tried out this sister restaurant to Asti. My dessert ruled - a Madjool fig beignet with turkish coffee ice cream and coffee syrup.
Weirdest window display that no one ever mentioned: Your Living Room furniture store on the corner of S. Congress and Barton Springs. Male and female mannequins couple sitting in a bed with no clothes on, welcoming a third mannequin (female), who is standing at the foot of the bed (with no clothes on).
Wildlife sighting: We have three sparrow eggs in an unused mailbox by our front door.
Most unexpected outcome of a domestic animal spat: Our Frankie kicked Angus the cat's butt while staying at Angus' house while we were at Schlitterbahn. No one kicks Angus' butt! Until, now, that is! No word yet on whether Frankie is invited back.
Favorite newish album: Band of Horses, Seattle USA (check them out June 25th at the Parish)
Best band news: What Made Milwaukee Famous just signed to Barsuk, which makes them labelmates with Smoosh; Team Dresch may be getting back together; Smoosh released their second album this week; Murder City Devils are headlining the Capitol Hill Block Party for a one-time-only reunion, on July 29 in Seattle - I'll be there!
Best detail in the utopian world of the West Wing: During the series finale, the chief justice of the supreme court (swearing in Jimmy Smits, no less) was a woman. Sigh.
Latest TV series epiphany: The end of season 4 of Angel is a metaphor for the difference between people whose feminist consciousness is raised, and those who remain under the spell of blissful ignorance. It even showed how when the spell is broken, you get depressed. I don't really think the writers meant it this way, it was more of an Are you better off being unhappy with free will vs. happy without free will thing, but it totally works.
Friday
Team Dresch lives!
It is true, that every once in a great while something good that has ended can be reborn, just as it was before. In this case, it is Team Dresch, with the original lesbionic rock action lineup! who has risen from the dead. OMG! as the kids say. John is going to see them tonight in Seattle. So far they are just playing the northwest, Brooklyn, and Chicago. OMG! My young rock sensibilities were nurtured on the albums "Personal Best" and "Captain My Captain" - "She's Amazing" is one of the best love songs I've ever heard, I found out who Phranc was by listening to the tribute song, "Uncle Phranc," and my hair was blown back and my eyes opened to the world of political punk rock possibility by "Hate the Christian Right."
OMG!
Wednesday
Good thing #594...ending
Continuing with the rather morbid theme my blog seems to be taking every now and then, I submit the latest thing to bite the dust. Our lovely, quiet, secret cove where we live with a view of downtown.
The demolition crew came and razed the 60+ year old house that used to stand across the yard from us, to make way for two houses that will completely block our view. The new owner/developer "Mike" is hereby designated as public enemy #1 around here. Extra irritating is that he can't be a day over 30. It bothers me when people that young have that much money AND have a corresponding air of entitlement AND decide to build two McMansions in a historic Austin neighborhood.
Thursday
The chickens of the world need your help!
Listening to KUT on the way to work today, I found out that today is International Respect for Chickens Day. The purpose of Respect for Chickens Day is to "celebrate the dignity, beauty and life of chickens and to protest against the bleakness of their lives in farming operations." Chickens represent something like 90% of the animals killed for meat in this country, and the conditions they live in are comparatively much worse than what cows are subjected to (we're talking relative levels of horror, here, of course). A non-profit called United Poultry Concerns, the impetus behind Respect for Chickens Day, does great policy work on behalf of chickens, like supporting a Delaware bill to give egg-laying hens more space to live in. Their website is full of interesting chicken activist resources, and pictures and stories of nice chickens who have been rescued. Also of note is the section called Think Like a Chicken, with poems and stories written from a chicken's point of view. I am a big fan of chickens, and stopped eating them almost completely a few years ago. Did you know that some types of chickens are endangered, and that they can make nice companions? I really enjoy our neighbor's little flock of chickens (and rooster)...they were peacefully pecking around the grass this morning as I pulled out of our driveway.
So for my chicken-eating buddies out there, maybe just today you can abstain from eating chicken or eggs out of Respect for Chickens Day!
Wednesday
TV, job, vacation - in that order
A lot of stuff is going on right now, and it's all jumbled up in my head so I'm just going to start with whatever I think of first....
First off, I want to say for the record that I would totally watch another season of West Wing with the new, incoming Santos administration. How awesome would it be to watch these characters navigate their first term? Santos (Jimmy Smits), VP Baker (the guy who played Al Bundy on Married w/ Children), Secretary of State Vinnick (Alan Alda), of course Chief of Staff Josh Lyman (Bradley Whitford), an as-yet-unknown position for Donna Moss (Janel Moloney-I'm so glad the writers finally got those two together in the last half of the final season), Mary Louise Parker (my fave!) as chief of legislative affairs, Sam Seaborn (Rob Lowe) as Deputy Chief of Staff, and Lou (Janeanne Garafolo) as Director of Communications. I would TOTALLY watch. But, good thing #593 coming to an end is, alas, The West Wing.
In other television news, I realized the other day while accidentally pausing on The Real Housewives of Orange County on Bravo that the infamously sexist/50s throwback husband "Slade" went to my high school in Anchorage. He was two years ahead of me, in the class of '87. Gross.
Veronica Mars still kicks ass. As does the character Chloe on "24," who is managing to simultaneously help save the country from domestic terrorists while evading the authorities (who are in league with the terrorists) AND having to periodically taser a dude who is harassing her in a hotel lobby while she hacks into top-secret government computer systems.
I will be changing jobs at the end of the summer - I got a starvation-wage gig at a university-based philanthropy and public policy research center for next school year. I will be a po graduate student again but much happier, I hope. One note of caution is that the dude I will work for is a bit snooty in that Chicago - Harvard school way (he was altogether nonplussed by the string of state universities on my vitae). I'll continue to do consulting for a local non-profit, which is my favoritist job. In the meantime, M. and I are going on vacation! Later this summer we're headed to Seattle for 4 days, and continuing up to Anchorage for 6 days to visit my buddy and her family (especially my new godkid). More on the vacation plans later, but we are taking applications for a dog-sitter for our little angel, Frankie:
First off, I want to say for the record that I would totally watch another season of West Wing with the new, incoming Santos administration. How awesome would it be to watch these characters navigate their first term? Santos (Jimmy Smits), VP Baker (the guy who played Al Bundy on Married w/ Children), Secretary of State Vinnick (Alan Alda), of course Chief of Staff Josh Lyman (Bradley Whitford), an as-yet-unknown position for Donna Moss (Janel Moloney-I'm so glad the writers finally got those two together in the last half of the final season), Mary Louise Parker (my fave!) as chief of legislative affairs, Sam Seaborn (Rob Lowe) as Deputy Chief of Staff, and Lou (Janeanne Garafolo) as Director of Communications. I would TOTALLY watch. But, good thing #593 coming to an end is, alas, The West Wing.
In other television news, I realized the other day while accidentally pausing on The Real Housewives of Orange County on Bravo that the infamously sexist/50s throwback husband "Slade" went to my high school in Anchorage. He was two years ahead of me, in the class of '87. Gross.
Veronica Mars still kicks ass. As does the character Chloe on "24," who is managing to simultaneously help save the country from domestic terrorists while evading the authorities (who are in league with the terrorists) AND having to periodically taser a dude who is harassing her in a hotel lobby while she hacks into top-secret government computer systems.
I will be changing jobs at the end of the summer - I got a starvation-wage gig at a university-based philanthropy and public policy research center for next school year. I will be a po graduate student again but much happier, I hope. One note of caution is that the dude I will work for is a bit snooty in that Chicago - Harvard school way (he was altogether nonplussed by the string of state universities on my vitae). I'll continue to do consulting for a local non-profit, which is my favoritist job. In the meantime, M. and I are going on vacation! Later this summer we're headed to Seattle for 4 days, and continuing up to Anchorage for 6 days to visit my buddy and her family (especially my new godkid). More on the vacation plans later, but we are taking applications for a dog-sitter for our little angel, Frankie:
Tuesday
Where does "Layabout" fall in this list?
I'm just posting this link because it's fun to look at lists of occupations. You know, like Parade Magazine's annual "What do People Make" issue? I love that issue. This one is Money Magazine's top 50 best jobs in America - but they have a bigger list of like 150 so you can look yours up and see how you stack up. Don't you just love social comparisons? Oh - and college professor appears to be the second best job in America, FYI.
Friday
Anyone know how to fix a Magic Merlin?
As I have been approaching my 35th birthday for the last few years, one internal exercise I force on myself is to try to determine exactly what my reasoning is for choosing not to have children. There are many reasons, which I have known my entire life, but I like to torture myself by reviewing the reasons just to make sure I haven't decided anything rashly or prematurely (like, say, at age 10). One reason I have come to realize is that I absolutely cannot bear childhood disappointment. It's one of those things that tears me up inside, including the reliving of my own. The optimistic innocence and eventual dashing of childhood dreams is excruciating to bear witness to.
Anyhoo, one of the more trivial but nonetheless memorable disappointments of my own childhood involved my dream of owning a Magic Merlin. My parents seemed to have no idea what sorts of things I liked, along with an inability to read my mind and know that all I wanted in the world in 1980 (could have been 1979, not sure) was a Magic Merlin. I remember for Christmas that year there was even a box that looked about the right size for a Merlin, but I opened it and it was something else (probably a doll, and I didn't like dolls).
So fast-forward about 25 years, and for Christmas 2005 my best friend sent me a box with her own Magic Merlin inside (with the original instruction booklet!). Enclosed was the following note:
"Childhood dreams can always come true! I have been meaning to send you this - I didn't make the connection until a year or two ago. I only got a Merlin because of my Uncle, otherwise I do not believe my mom would have thought it the best. I have probably had this for 20+ years. Thought I'd share it with you as I remember playing it tons..."
She knew I had always wanted one and hadn't realized that she had one all this time. It was the best gift ever! Until I put the 6 batteries in it and it wouldn't turn on. Drat! So, does anyone know how to fix one of these? My 9 year old self would love you forever.
Tuesday
Joan Jett is comin' to town!
She's playing at the Republic of Texas Biker Rally (ROT Rally) on June 3rd. I think out at the Expo Center, not sure yet. I had a dream about it last night - I was there with all the bikers. And then there was this pasture with cows in it, and all the cows were sitting upright. It gets a little fuzzy from there.
Monday
RD analysis
In my last post I escaped without adding any analysis or point of view of my own, as I am want to do. But I will tag onto Rockabilachica's recent post about the subject, and be more specific about my unpopular view.
In theory, it shouldn't be hard to tell the difference between exploitation and empowerment in the public sphere. Isn't empowerment at the very least the absence of exploitation? But here we get into the age-old debate of whether someone is empowered because they think they are. I'm sure a lot of the girls and women in Girls Gone Wild think they are empowered (or at least they did initially). Who's to say they aren't? Well, I'll go out on a limb and and say that no, they aren't empowered by that. Am i imposing my dogmatic views on them? I guess so. What about the African American student who says that without a doubt, in her mind she has never experienced racism? Can someone be objectively exploited without subjectively experiencing it? I think yes. With roller derby, it is a lot less clear cut than GGW (which is clearly run by men for men), Suicide Girls (recent article here) - run by a man for men with the veneer of individual empowerment for the models, which is basically a marketing ploy to make alt-porn consumers feel better - and even the modern-day resurgence of burlesque.
Part of the problem is this business with "reclaiming." In one of the comments under Twisty's post, a roller derby participant points out that TXRD symbols like the mudflap woman and sexually derogatory team names like the putas del fuego are their symbols, their words. Are they really? I'm not so convinced. Nor am I convinced that we have reclaimed gender epithets like "Bitch" and "Cunt," and I'm not convinced that African Americans have successfully reclaimed racial epithets. Though I have no systematic data to support this, I would venture a guess that the use of these terms outside of individual, intimate communities of women and African Americans is still considered disrespectul and has a violent connotation. Another skater wrote that she couldn't imagine what was sexy about watching women fall down, and thus the appeal had to be about the athleticism. Hello? That's some serious denial. The whole point for some seems to be that when the woman falls down, the butt goes in the air, the skirt flips up.
I have attended many performances of non-mainstream, underground, alternative (whatever you want to call it) art and music that use reclaiming and irony as the key component of the show. I can pretty confidently say that the message is totally lost on the majority of the audience who see a woman on stage and just want to see some skin and come-hither moves, already. This is roller derby's potential problem - the intention may be noble - it IS athletic! it IS about tough, strong women! - but it doesn't quite get translated amid the spanking and pillow-fighting and skirts flipping up to reveal ruffly underwear. Indeed, the bouts are often marketed as "girl-on-girl action." Is that supposed to be feminist? Or athletic? Roller Derby enthusiasts defend these aspects by emphasizing the athleticism of the sport, and explaining that the players choose what to wear. I don't have the time or patience to get into a discussion about the existence of free will or how we choose or come to prefer things, but needless to say all choices are made in particular contexts. Feminism is not simply "women doing what they want." And even if MOST of the women wore regular shorts and tee-shirts, the face of Roller Derby would still be the sexy outfit - because that's what sells. Does it make a difference if there are equal numbers of women and men (of all sexual orientations and identities) in the audience? While it definitely feels good to see lots of other women there, and it does mean something that it's not 90% men, it's important to point out that the male gaze is not limited to men. We've all been conditioned to see women (including ourselves) through the male gaze, and being gay or feminist or any other patriarchally subversive identity does not exempt us from participating in patriarchal rituals from time to time - it's pretty much unavoidable, which is a source of much frustration for me personally.
What i have always had a problem reconciling is the unquestioned, inextricable connection between "Woman" and "Sexuality." Why must so many performances and images by/of women end up being about their sexuality? Why can't it be about showcasing their skill and mastery, period? Why is it so freaking important that women "express their sexuality" in all that they do?? I don't see men running around determined to express their sexuality (well, at least not to the same extent). In my opinion, all this does is add to the already entrenched view that women as individual, thinking persons cannot be separated from their mandated role to be "sexy" or whatever. Maybe we should all, as humans, be seen as complex creatures made up of both our intellectuality (I know that's not a real word, heh heh) AND sexuality, but until we are ALL seen that way, the fact that women are singled out for this puts us at a social disadvantage relative to males. I believe this is because our culture is a product of the centuries-old view of the male/female dichotomy of males as connected to the rational-abstract (i.e. more important things) and females as connected to the body-earthly (i.e. less important things). It pisses me off that no matter how much a woman achieves, in the end she is nothing more than something to look at and/or have sex with. I see this all the fucking time in the music world - especially the more male-dominated subcultures of music.
This is a really complicated issue, and there are at least 15 side-bars that could be written about the different topics it brings up. So my wishy-washy conclusion is that some aspects of Roller Derby are feminist, or potentially feminist, but most of it is not. And that is perfectly ok, it is what it is.
In theory, it shouldn't be hard to tell the difference between exploitation and empowerment in the public sphere. Isn't empowerment at the very least the absence of exploitation? But here we get into the age-old debate of whether someone is empowered because they think they are. I'm sure a lot of the girls and women in Girls Gone Wild think they are empowered (or at least they did initially). Who's to say they aren't? Well, I'll go out on a limb and and say that no, they aren't empowered by that. Am i imposing my dogmatic views on them? I guess so. What about the African American student who says that without a doubt, in her mind she has never experienced racism? Can someone be objectively exploited without subjectively experiencing it? I think yes. With roller derby, it is a lot less clear cut than GGW (which is clearly run by men for men), Suicide Girls (recent article here) - run by a man for men with the veneer of individual empowerment for the models, which is basically a marketing ploy to make alt-porn consumers feel better - and even the modern-day resurgence of burlesque.
Part of the problem is this business with "reclaiming." In one of the comments under Twisty's post, a roller derby participant points out that TXRD symbols like the mudflap woman and sexually derogatory team names like the putas del fuego are their symbols, their words. Are they really? I'm not so convinced. Nor am I convinced that we have reclaimed gender epithets like "Bitch" and "Cunt," and I'm not convinced that African Americans have successfully reclaimed racial epithets. Though I have no systematic data to support this, I would venture a guess that the use of these terms outside of individual, intimate communities of women and African Americans is still considered disrespectul and has a violent connotation. Another skater wrote that she couldn't imagine what was sexy about watching women fall down, and thus the appeal had to be about the athleticism. Hello? That's some serious denial. The whole point for some seems to be that when the woman falls down, the butt goes in the air, the skirt flips up.
I have attended many performances of non-mainstream, underground, alternative (whatever you want to call it) art and music that use reclaiming and irony as the key component of the show. I can pretty confidently say that the message is totally lost on the majority of the audience who see a woman on stage and just want to see some skin and come-hither moves, already. This is roller derby's potential problem - the intention may be noble - it IS athletic! it IS about tough, strong women! - but it doesn't quite get translated amid the spanking and pillow-fighting and skirts flipping up to reveal ruffly underwear. Indeed, the bouts are often marketed as "girl-on-girl action." Is that supposed to be feminist? Or athletic? Roller Derby enthusiasts defend these aspects by emphasizing the athleticism of the sport, and explaining that the players choose what to wear. I don't have the time or patience to get into a discussion about the existence of free will or how we choose or come to prefer things, but needless to say all choices are made in particular contexts. Feminism is not simply "women doing what they want." And even if MOST of the women wore regular shorts and tee-shirts, the face of Roller Derby would still be the sexy outfit - because that's what sells. Does it make a difference if there are equal numbers of women and men (of all sexual orientations and identities) in the audience? While it definitely feels good to see lots of other women there, and it does mean something that it's not 90% men, it's important to point out that the male gaze is not limited to men. We've all been conditioned to see women (including ourselves) through the male gaze, and being gay or feminist or any other patriarchally subversive identity does not exempt us from participating in patriarchal rituals from time to time - it's pretty much unavoidable, which is a source of much frustration for me personally.
What i have always had a problem reconciling is the unquestioned, inextricable connection between "Woman" and "Sexuality." Why must so many performances and images by/of women end up being about their sexuality? Why can't it be about showcasing their skill and mastery, period? Why is it so freaking important that women "express their sexuality" in all that they do?? I don't see men running around determined to express their sexuality (well, at least not to the same extent). In my opinion, all this does is add to the already entrenched view that women as individual, thinking persons cannot be separated from their mandated role to be "sexy" or whatever. Maybe we should all, as humans, be seen as complex creatures made up of both our intellectuality (I know that's not a real word, heh heh) AND sexuality, but until we are ALL seen that way, the fact that women are singled out for this puts us at a social disadvantage relative to males. I believe this is because our culture is a product of the centuries-old view of the male/female dichotomy of males as connected to the rational-abstract (i.e. more important things) and females as connected to the body-earthly (i.e. less important things). It pisses me off that no matter how much a woman achieves, in the end she is nothing more than something to look at and/or have sex with. I see this all the fucking time in the music world - especially the more male-dominated subcultures of music.
This is a really complicated issue, and there are at least 15 side-bars that could be written about the different topics it brings up. So my wishy-washy conclusion is that some aspects of Roller Derby are feminist, or potentially feminist, but most of it is not. And that is perfectly ok, it is what it is.
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